Thursday, November 25, 2010

#55

I urgently need to let go of the negativity and uneasiness that is eating me every second for the past 20 hours now. Today I just don't feel like even trying to make efforts to do what it takes to be happy. As much as I would've wished to smile with all my heart, I just did not do enough. Not even a bit at that. The smile I tried to flash all day seemed fake and lifeless. I know if I had made a genuine effort, it wouldn't have taken much to get me back up and pumping. Laughing and joking and jumping and goofing around. Full of energy.
But I din't want to invest a lot of energy into faking that energy. Faking happiness might've worked at that moment, but it would've made me much more unhappy later on.
And as for the reason behind this dispirited mood today, I can only try not to give it the importance I'm attributing to it right now. I will have to learn to un-prioritize it and stop taking it too seriously to have a negative and unhealthy influence for me. Nothing should play juggler with my happiness. Not even the things that make me happy.

5 comments:

D2 said...

Faking isn't bad once in a while as long you don't start deceiving yourself of you really are. Then things might get a little worth worrying about.

Chitranshi said...

i was just feelin something similar.. n i read dis :|

G said...

@ D2 Faking happiness with the things that are supposed to actually make you happy is a BIG thing to worry about !! They invariably make you do what you are not. Isin't that deception :-|

@Chitranshi Di, see I can read whats in your mind so well *_*

Vivarjitha said...

hi...thanx for ur comment on my blog...luv urs too...keep followin mine:)

Dhupa said...

yaar...even i feel...faking shud nt be a part of ur lyf...
u shud nvr live a feigned life...