Saturday, December 27, 2014

#101. About time I wrote this one

It's been three weeks. From that day when I found it hard to stay composed to today when I rather have my solitude for company- there has been a strange kind of transformation in me. Adults tend to refer to this phenomenon as maturing, so I guess this must be it.

I'm quietly watching the year slip by. As much as I want to hold on to it dearly for 2014 has given me some most beautiful memories, I am prepared to let it go. Just as I learned over the year that sometimes the best way to celebrate the presence of something in your life is by letting it leave. No grudges, no complaining, no tears and no grieving. No chest-thumping drama. Just a silent unsaid farewell. If you know me personally you'll know why is it a big deal for me to part with things and people I hold dear to me.

The year also taught me the importance of positive reinforcement. There was a beautiful article I once read about using your daily password as a means to set reminders for your goals . I started practising the same and now swear by the impact it made on a potato of a person that I am (more on that later). I realize that all it takes is that one little kick to get things moving in life. A pat on my back for also successfully completing the 100 happy days challenge early this year (I did mine on my Instagram profile).

Last two months drove me insane with all the work I had signed up for. I went into a hiding, refused to meet anyone, allowed only a few into my cocoon and spoke with them incessantly about my worries. For those in this circle who stuck by and tolerated all my whims during that phase when, if I were them, I would definitely have kicked myself hard for being an irritating messed up wreck - I am eternally grateful. For those who considered bailing out on me as an easier option - I can only thank them with my heart for teaching me the essence of detachment. Because in the coming months, I will have to learn to part. To gather from my past that I have hoarded over the years, collect it all and lock everything away, far from my reach and farther from my memories.
I will hate it, but I will be doing it.

Bring on 2015, I say. I am shit scared of you, but I will face you and I will win you over :)

PS: I'll also be changing the URL of this blog. Detachment, you see.